Teaching Body Language to Children
January 25th, 2012Three qualities revealed through body posture and body gestures are passivity, aggressiveness and assertiveness.
Passivity, or timidity, is shown by mumbling or stuttering, slouching, looking down at the floor, nervously picking at fingers or biting nails, having arms folded in a protective manner with the body hunched, having legs close together to minimize space the body takes up and standing further from another person than a confident person would stand. Children who predominantly display passive body language are more open to victimization.
Aggressiveness is shown by shouting, using a sarcastic or accusing tone, having a tense upright posture where the person uses height to intimidate, staring unremittingly at the other person, having tight fists, pointing, folding arms or having hands on hips with legs more than slightly apart, standing too close to another person and invading their comfortable body space, and leaning forward in a threatening manner. Children who predominantly display aggressive body language can intimidate and find that other people are less likely to want to make friends and will probably try to avoid them.
Assertiveness is shown by speaking clearly and firmly with a well-modulated tone (not in a monotone), having a relaxed upright posture, having a gaze that meets the other person’s gaze while occasionally looking away, having hands relaxed by the sides and legs slightly apart, leaning forward to talk to another person to show interest in what is being said and standing a comfortable distance from the other person. Children who show assertive body language are more likely to command respect from other people, their opinions are more likely to be valued and they are less likely to be bullied or be suspected of being bullies.
Discuss the following questions with the class:
- Passive, aggressive and assertive are words to describe certain types of behaviour. What do you know about each type of behaviour? How might passive people appear? How might aggressive people appear? How might assertive people appear?
- If someone acts confidently, people will believe that they are confident whether or not this is the case. And when people change in the way they behave towards them because they believe they are confident, that will make that person feel more confident. On the whole, how would you like to be seen? Discuss the consequences of being seen as passive, aggressive and assertive.
Activity
Invite children to show what posture is best to adopt in the following situations:
- You are in trouble from a teacher and it is deserved. (A slightly timid posture is best to show meekness and regret. An aggressive, defiant posture is likely to get you into more trouble. A confident posture in this situation might be misinterpreted by the teacher as arrogance.)
- You are out shopping in a big town. (You need to look confident so that no one is tempted to pick on you or to try to talk you into doing something you don’t want to do.)
- Someone has unjustly accused you of doing something. (You need to look outraged and angry to show you have been wronged.)
Ask the children to practise reading body language by watching people carefully when they speak – and by watching actors in films and on the television. They should also try matching their body language with the message they want to give.