Mommy, How are Babies Made?
One day, as you were sorting your groceries in the kitchen, your 5-year-old daughter entered the room. She ran towards your direction with a strange look in her eyes. As she sat on your lap, she began saying, “Mom, I watched something on TV.” Then she popped the dreaded question, “Mommy, how are babies made?”
Since most children at the age of 5 and up are already starting school, they get to hear a lot of things from other people, most especially from their peers. Their friends at this stage become very important to them. Sex is a topic that becomes a source of curiosity among youngsters, even kids. That is why, once they hear any idea on otherwise taboo topics, they are most likely to be intrigued by it.
For preschoolers, asking sexually-related questions is merely out of simple curiosity. As a matter of fact, oftentimes, parents are the ones who avoid these topics. And even if these kids are ready for sophisticated answer to their inquiries, you don’t really have to answer them completely. After all, they would not still be able to understand the concept of adult love. Much more, hearing all the facts about menstruation, erections and other complex body processes related to sexuality can be very scary for them at this stage, even up to the moment they reach grade school.
In order to respond to the curious inquiries of your child about sex, one must do it in a-matter-of-fact manner. It also helps to calmly and kindly answer the questions without making the topic sound like something taboo. You can rehearse answers with your spouse or alone if you think that you are not that comfortable with impromptu conversations about sex. Do the talk when both of you are at ease. Another suggestion would be doing it in the car when you can avoid eye contact so that you can be more relaxed while talking to your child,
Short and uncomplicated answers will be best suitable to kindergartners while detailed answers about conception and birth is well suited for grade schoolers. However, you do not have to deal with a detailed explanation about sexual intercourse yet. Use the correct terms rather than pet names for the organs involved so as not to impose the feeling that mentioning the said names is something to be embarrassed about.
Answer the child’s question as long as he or she is interested in the topic. Do not be tempted to overload him/her with information. Just answer what he/she wants to know about the topic.
Encourage the child to verbalize what he/she wants to know about the matter. As a parent, you should be there to guide your child in discovering the truths that he/she could not decipher for him/herself. However, if you do not know how to answer your child’s question, you should also be responsible enough to tell him/her honestly that you are not aware about the said subject but you are willing to look for the answer for him/her. It is also good if you take everyday as an opportunity to explain the concept of sexuality and reproduction to your child little by little. Telling it through a story can be a good way to prepare your child.
As parents, we have to recognize our limitations in looking after our child especially that we cannot be there behind them to shield them from everything in this world. However, with the proper guidance and adequate teaching, our children will surely be properly guided into making the right choices in the future.